


Tainted Beauty

by SquaryQ



Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: Alternate Universe - Zombies, F/M, M/M, Zombie Apocalypse, Zombies
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-07-03
Updated: 2015-07-03
Packaged: 2018-04-07 12:53:37
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 955
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4263945
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SquaryQ/pseuds/SquaryQ
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>There aren't many people left anymore. Too many people have already died. Perhaps people would credit us for surviving for this long. It has been five years after all. Five years of hell. I'm twenty now, it seems absurd to think I have only aged five years when I feel ever so much wiser for not succumbing to the wrath of this bleak and cruel world.</p><p>My friends are alive, my friends are dead. I've lost more than I have been able to keep alive.  I'm grateful for life but I'm sure more than a handful of men long gone were grateful for death. This plague has ruined us. Soiled and tainted this beautful world...</p>
            </blockquote>





	Tainted Beauty

There aren't many people left anymore. Too many people have already died. Perhaps people would credit us for surviving for this long. It has been five years after all. Five years of hell. I'm twenty now, it seems absurd to think I have only aged five years when I feel ever so much wiser for not succumbing to the wrath of this bleak and cruel world.

My friends are alive, my friends are dead. I've lost more than I have been able to keep alive. I'm grateful for life but I'm sure more than a handful of men long gone were grateful for death. This plague has ruined us. Soiled and tainted this beautful world.

.

.

We've watched the flames engulf our friends, our loves our hopes but I can never feel that numbness that some of the others can feel. The men and women who lead us are broken but strong. They had the power to give up their morals to preserve our lives. Every day we thank them and idolise them. But on nights like these, our bottled up anger is released. I can hear Deiter, a blond guy who is two or three years older than me is yelling at our 'leaders'.

"Marco... " Horseface Kiristein usually talks to his fallen friend during these 'funerals'. He finds peace in it. I honestly think he lost his mind a long time ago, but he can control his pain for long enough to keep himself alive. We lost the optimistic Jean Kiristein when we lost Marco Bodt. And that was at the beginning of this attack.

Besides, Jean Kiristein isn't the most unstable individual here; hell, we're all a little bit crazy nowadays. Especially Daz. Daz has lost a lot of friends thanks to this hellish world. He's tried to give up on more than one account, but one thing keeps him going; a young girl that he has said reminded him of his childhood friend. Nobody knows the identity of the older man's life force but we all appreciate whoever this girl is.

Jean is holding a jacket, a trenchcoat, black and dirty but hers. He'll start wearing it tomorrow but right now, he's just breathing in her scent as his tears stain the 'unsanitary' material. I look away, no. No, I don't want to see the funeral for the fallen tonight, I just don't!

I can feel eyes on me. His eyes. His cold and hard eyes that resemble mist swirling on a lake. Hey, in a world of hell, dwelling on consistent colours is a very assuring way of clarifying that you're still alive. He said my own eyes remind him of the ocean, seas from a distant country, seas so teal that I doubt that they really exist. 

"Eren?" Potato girl, Sasha Blouse, hunter by nature and comic by choice, cannot smile here either. She puts a hand on my shoulder. I'm surprised that Sasha and her best friend, Connie can still crack jokes.

"Eren, Ackerman wants to talk to you."

"But-."

"Now, Eren." She prompts, like everybody else, Sasha has cold dry, beautiful yet almost dead eyes. Her eyes are gold like honey but cold like ice and as hard as stone.

I shake my head, burying my face into my palms.

"C'mon! Ackerman wants to talk to you now." Sasha says, pulling me up from my place of mourning.

"I don't want to." I fold my arms.

"I'll drag you."

"Drag me then." I challenge her. It's not a good idea to try to challenge Sasha Blouse but I've lost all motivation to care about consequences. I'm a dead man walking and I'm just waiting death out.

"Oi! Connie! Help me take Eren to Ackerman! "

"One two three!" Her skinhead friend is by her side almost instantly. He takes my legs and she takes my arms, picking he up the best that they can and carrying me to a more isolated area.

I am then abandoned to fend for myself.

"Eren." His deep and husky voice is barely a whisper as he murmurs into my ear. It sends shivers down my spine. "Are you okay?"

My mind shattered not too long ago but he's been trying to help me. Too bad I'm too ridiculous to sort out my problems! Grief is a bitch and everybody knows it. I just don't want this. I look away from Levi Ackerman, a distant relative of one of the fallen. I make a fist. Why didn't he help her!

"No." Why couldn't I lie to him. I've told everybody else that I was fine, even though almost everybody can see me through.

"You're resenting me, you're hurt that I didn't save your love." My face heats up. We weren't together!

"I can't save people who are too far gone. She told me to take her jacket and scarf and go." I feel a stab in my stomach. He's lying! I turn away from him and hug my knees.

Until I feel a warm worn woolly piece of material that's starting to unravel, fall across my back. I cannot help but cry then. Mikasa's scarf!

I fall apart.

"Mikasa! Oh Mikasa! Mikasa! Why! Why? Mikasa! MIKASA!"

"You and I are a lot alike, Eren." They have the same eyes....

"How so...?" I demand.

"I see my fallen sister Isabelle in you. You see Mikasa in me, I can see it in your eyes." I hug him tightly. 

"You can't die, Ackerman! You can't! I don't want to lose that!"

"You can't die either, then Eren." He holds me as I cry. He sounds stained but he's most likely to be unfamiliar with being hugged.

I feel Mikasa's scarf be wrapped up around me.

"Thank you..."


End file.
